Shared Metaphor: Gnome Cloud Meat Pastries 2.0

The problem with communication … is the illusion that it has been accomplished.

– George Bernard Shaw

One of the topics arising frequently in my conversations is the need for clear vocabulary to describe emerging concepts forced by technical evolution and how those concepts fit into to a personal understanding of the world.

Dialects arise, but until we have shared symbols and metaphors these discussions must always be clumsy. (after we have shared vocabulary, it will still mostly be clumsy)

This is a feeble (and misguided) attempt to share some metaphor.

Gnomes: Some of you might know of venture funded technical start ups that are going to change the world. Some of those start ups might have ridiculous valuations and little or no revenue. Some just have no revenue. . . at least they have a business plan, good luck with that.

Clouds: Everyone knows about ‘the clouds‘ Or maybe they don’t? Or maybe the whole point is that they don’t? Or something? Some anonymous thing over there does something like this other thing I once knew and could touch. . .

Meat: Every organization probably has some hardware and some software, but even in sophisticated technical endeavors there are niggling little tasks that probably should have been automated a long time ago. How are those tasks accomplished? Meatware. . . but of course.

Le Patisserie: This might be less common for some, but I fear those of you in software might have lived it in one form or another. This might also be referred to as ‘dessert tray‘ Agile, or euphemistically as frAgile development. You take one part flailing development organization, two parts buzzword compliance, cut in some shortening or lard, and then bake until golden brown, top with whipped cream and viola! Sprinkle with legacy code if you want a real treat!!

Now comes the fun part. . . mix and match. I haven’t found a permutation that isn’t relevant, informative and amusing. (Ok, so I might be easily amused)

Cloud Gnomes – a virtualization startup

Meat Pastries – developers doing mind numbing repetitive work with Agile razzle dazzle fairy dust.

Meat Clouds – Uhm, like. . . built the pyramids and make your shoes

I leave the rest as an exercise for the reader:

Gnome Meat Pastry Clouds

Cloud Pastry Gnome Meats

Pastry Meat Cloud Gnomes

. . .

Pardon me, I have to get back to playing with puppets . . . and gathering underpants.